I've got the Power!

My daughter, Meredith, takes the credit for this one.

A couple of years ago I was preparing to sit my driving test practical. The hardest part of this for me was getting over the self-belief that I was never supposed to be a driver. I'd had a block about it all my adult life. It was only when we moved from London to a rural area of Scotland that I realised I couldn't put it off any longer and that I would have to address it. Dumfries and Galloway is a region of 2500 square miles and the public transport system is very limited. I would have to to reinvent myself as a driver finally. One of the most difficult aspects of passing the test was the mental preparation. My belief about myself as being a non-driver for life was impacting on my confidence.

Meredith suggested a strategy to me at the time which I took up because it's so simple yet very effective. She proposed that to boost my confidence and give me a burst of energy, I should keep playing in my head the refrain from that song that goes: "I've got the power!" I don't know the rest of the song, what it's called or even who sings it. It's used in the film Bruce Almighty starring Jim Carrey, which is where Meredith came across it.

I took it up enthusiastically and found it worked for me really well. It's just so gleeful, empowering and slightly crazy - a bit manic to be honest, but it so charges you up. The great thing too is no-one, of course, can hear this going on as you don't have to do it aloud! It's like those annoying tunes that get stuck in your head from time to time, that you can't seem to shake off. The effect of this one is that it boosts you mentally very quickly but also has an impact on your physiology. You automatically walk with more of a spring in your step. This creates a positive loop as it further reinforces a positive mental state. (By the way, I also passed my driving test first time - though this wasn't the only strategy I used to get throught that particular ordeal.)

I've not been using the technique for some time but it came back to me recently and I decided to use it again. For the last couple of weeks I've not been sleeping that well and also working long hours, so felt the need to recharge myself. It certainly helped.

Try it today. Try it right now! I guarantee you'll feel better. By the way it doesn't have to be this particular song. Pick any one that has a good energy feel to it but R&B is probably the right genre, especially if you sing it from the perspective of someone with the energy level of the late James Brown!

Have a nice day

One of the things I do every morning to try to ensure that I have a good day is to affirm that I am going to have one.

On waking each morning, while I am waiting for the kettle to boil for my coffee, I say aloud ten times: "Something wonderful will happen for me today." Now that doesn't mean that bad things don't happen to me but it does mean that I am approaching each day in the right frame of mind so that I am more likely to attract good luck. Even when things go wrong, I am more able to put a positive spin on the event because I have programmed myself with this expectation.

It also means that I notice more that is already right with my life, things that I might otherwise take for granted. It does make you more likely to count your blessings.

Each evening, I review my day and there is invariably something wonderful to be acknowledged, no matter how "ordinary". Sometimes it is simply the gift of still being alive. Something that can be taken away in an instant. A few years back, a colleague of mine died while working at her PC at home. She was found sitting in her chair, a cup of coffee at her side. Death is not always something you can prepare for.

Perhaps we should all live every day as if it were going to be our last, providing that doesn't lead to our being selfish or inconsiderate.

In the affirmative

I first started using affirmations several years ago and they are now part of my daily routine. I like them a lot because they're simple. They require little effort too which appeals to me greatly. It's the fast happiness approach.

There are some basic "rules" required to using affirmations. They have to be positive (of course). So you wouldn't affirm: "I wish I wasn't so tired". Better to say instead: "I have abundant energy." The reason for this is that your subconscious doesn't understand negative commands. If you say: "I am not a smoker", your subconsious will hear "I am a smoker" and you're stuck.

The other rule is that your affirmation should be in the present tense. If you wish for something in the future then what you're trying to affirm will always dangle before you, out of reach, like the proverbial carrot. So you affirm in the now. It doesn't matter if you don't believe consciously what you're saying. Your subconscious will take it in and start reprogramming how you operate. This is because the subconscious doesn't have a sense of irony or humour, and will interpret everything you say literally. That's why you have to be very careful what you tell yourself. I try not to use the expression "pain in the arse" for instance, for this very reason.

I first came across the affirmation method in the book You Can Heal your Life by Louise Hay. The most powerful and fundamental affirmation she recommends that you say to yourself every day is: "I love and approve of myself." It's more powerful if you say it aloud. It's even more powerful if you look at yourself in the mirror when you say it. What you're doing is taping over all the negative messages that have tended to become habitual. I work with a woman who is a wonderful person but I have heard her say so many times to herself when she makes a mistake: "Oh, you stupid woman!" We all tend to be like that, being our own harshest critic when we should be supporting ourselves.

Don't worry that you'll become arrogant or narcisstic in loving yourself. People who are like that are actually insecure and covering it up. By working on yourself through positive afirmations you'll actually come across in a more positive light to others because you'll feel better about yourself and people will pick up on that.

I worked with a recovering drug addict who used the Louise Hay book, telling himself over and over again: "I love and approve of myself," even though at the time, as he put it, he felt "like a sack of shit". Eventually though, this process helped him stay off drugs and he was able to start a new life. He didn't need to believe in the technique every step of the way for it to work.

The thing is to be patient, allow the process time to work, make it a daily habit and you will see changes.